Notes:

Latest blog posts from Brainspank

Here’s what I want
I want to take The Swirly with me to Denny’s. There’s no way she’d be cool with it. Still, I wish I could. All she’s gonna want is a small bowl of water with some tuna juice in it. She has never shown the remotest interest in anything besides IAMS and Fancy Feast. Human food is barely...
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Published 2 days ago

The inevitable madness of being
There was a shooting in a Toys R Us somewhere down here today. Palm Desert. Not gang related. It was “an argument between two groups of shoppers” -WSJ. Well now, that’s encouraging. Fighting over what? Toys? Two people dead, so probably at least two dipshits ambling slowly down...
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Published 3 days ago

To be thankful
What exactly is that? I’m thankful I’m not some random dumbass. Happy I’m cognizant and able to react and able to self determine to a degree. Love in my life. Good family and good friends. Fuzzy loving critters. Animals are to your hands and heart what delicious pie is to your mouth...
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Published 4 days ago

What If We Let The Banks Fail? -by Josh
Nov 17, 2008 12:49 AM What If We Let The Banks Fail? Since the beginning of the financial crisis, one of the things that has been most striking is the unanimity of opinion that large financial institutions cannot be allowed to fail. The conventional wisdom is so one-sided in this regard that...
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Published 5 days ago

Drinkability
I got nothin. I’m rolling the bones, hoping I can come up with something. Sometimes it works. Where is everyone on wind chimes? Love hate for me. I never wear bright red. It’s a dumb color on a man no matter what. It’s raining. Excellent. She was a class A cruiser aspirated by...
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Published 6 days ago

Do The Right Thing
Fuck me. So there was this piece on CNN tonight about how Michelle Obama has a chance to alter the stereotype of black women as overwieght, loud and ignorant. Guess what footage they used? Eddie Murphy as his fat obnoxious wife, Rasputia, in “Norbit”. What? Blackface. How lame is that? I...
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Published 7 days ago

Pie in my pork
I’ve got to tell you how strange my life has become. I don’t work anymore. Car and apartment dirty. Filthy. Full of unnecessary things, copious refuse and random detritus. Grime. Disgusting. Can’t bring myself to care. Keeping an eye out for bugs. They knock at the door all...
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Published a week ago

News of the world
We’re fucked. In the past few months the market has lost forty seven percent of it’s value. Unemployment is a vertical dragrace. A precipitous ascent. These two items represent America’s testicles. The market and jobs is our nutsack. Balls meet vise. There’s probably not a single...
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Published 2 weeks ago

By far the best spam I’ve ever received
In my country, this will be the national anthem: This from earlIsebella. “I am 22 years old and my sex imply has gone down to all but nothing. Sex with my boyfriend of 5 years has eternally been excellent and I possess eternally had an orgasm. I habituated to to masturbate and dont drawn do...
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Published 2 weeks ago

*President Cucumber
Cheney and Gonzales indicted by grand jury. Stevens loses in Alaska and Lieberman gets to carry on while we try to move on. Tres Grandes beg for big cash and I can’t believe Our Man is smiling. Sheezus. I hate that Benedict Fliptop gets off easy. He sucks. If he doesn’t owe, there...
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Published 2 weeks ago