Notes:

Latest blog posts from Dirty Little Secret

Dinnertime, car riding and a reflex I still have
Having dinner as a kid was (as I realize now) a not pleasant experience. At the time, I thought it was what it was... dinnertime.br /br /As kids, we all sat in the kitchen at the table to eat dinner. My parents never joined us unless it was a holiday or something else where it required them to... Read more...
Published 3 months ago

Struggling with some things...
You know, I think that sometimes I take such a long break or lose my will to post is because I feel like all I do is whine. Seriously. I was raised with the 'stop complaining/crying and buck up!' mentality. So instead of sharing, I tend to head the polar opposite way and just clam up.br /br... Read more...
Published 3 months ago

What is "normal"?
Sometimes I lie awake at night and wonder if I'm putting too much stock into being 'normal'. What is "NORMAL", anyway?br /br /For example, people always say things like, "I'm truly happy now".... as compared to what? How does a person measure happiness? I know I have moments of happy, but to... Read more...
Published 4 months ago

Wow.. I really internalize things way too much
It's times like these, that I really can't stand myself. If I had the means to, I'd punch myself square in the face until I passed out, because I can't stand to be around people like me and I HATE being like THIS.br /br /I read something and immediately turn that into a, "Why don't they like me"... Read more...
Published 4 months ago

Concrete Angel... can we rise above?
When you least expect it, some not-so-pleasant thoughts come rushing back.br /br /A few days ago something happened at the school where I work. One of the male teachers has a very difficult class this year. I personally feel it's a combination of having too many behavioral problems in his class... Read more...
Published 4 months ago

Sticks and Stones
As an adult, it seems the most prevalent memories I have from my childhood are negative.br /br /I'm not sure if that's because the majority of events that took place were negative or if it's because the negative makes a bigger impact on memory than good? I think I remember hearing years ago... Read more...
Published 5 months ago

Post Traumatic Stress Disorder - Written By: Untreatable
PTSD is basically the nightmare that refuses to go away. A single event or a series event is always in the back of your brain waiting to attack. A trigger as small as a smell can send off a mini movie which is capable of tearing your soul apart. Flashbacks with so much power that they send... Read more...
Published 5 months ago

Guest Blogger - Untreatable
Hello everyone.br /br /I have asked a href="http://www.untreatableonline.com/2008/01/introduction.html"Untreatable/a, author of "a href="http://www.untreatableonline.com/"Untreatable's Blog - Borderline Personality Self Harm Depression/a" to guest post here on Dirty Little Secret.br /br /He has... Read more...
Published 5 months ago

Summer quickly approaches... and reminds me of swimming
span style="font-size:85%;"**Just to anyone who might find this a little disturbing to read, it contains a little more graphic information than some may care to read.. so please, just read with caution or stop reading where I have placed an asterik. Thanks. /spanbr /br /I'm looking forward to... Read more...
Published 5 months ago

Where I've been
I made a short post on my a href="http://ringtailsquealer.blogspot.com/2008/04/i-have-stick-in-my-rear-why-ive-been.html"other blog/a giving an explanation for my absence. Albeit a very short explanation, I want everyone to know that I'm alive and kicking.. but that I'm just kicking a bit weakly... Read more...
Published 5 months ago

My biggest fear
I think my single biggest fear, is screwing up the lives of my children.br /br /I worry almost constantly about this, because I know the mistakes I've made already and they scare me.br /br /I'm a big time yeller. They are both to the age where the hormones are starting to kick up and the "I'm... Read more...
Published 6 months ago

My failure at confrontation
I've noticed that as I become older, I'm a little better at confrontation than I used to be.br /br /That is to say, that I will now confront someone when I have no other choice. br /br /About 9 years ago, my husband and I went to marriage counseling. Part of our "issue" of simply cohabitating... Read more...
Published 6 months ago