Notes:

Latest blog posts from Luggage Tuesdays

Floor Plans to Mummy Exhibit (Image)
Floor Plans to Mummy Exhibit (Image). Credit: Karen Spiegelman, Mike Spiegelman.
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Published 2 days ago

Test Results
Mike completed the quiz "Which Preston Sturges Film Are You?" with the result You are the 1940 film Christmas in July!.You love to enter a radio contest where you submit a pathetic slogan for coffee. Your coworkers would rather give you a bogus telegram declaring you're the winner, thereby able...
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Published 3 days ago

Family Restaurant Menu, Parts 13 & 14: Advertise in This Menu/Advertisements in This Menu
And now, a personal memo from Mr. Henry Sommers, Senior Middle Manager for this family restaurant franchise:Hey. In the restaurant industry, we can gauge you, our guest, from the way you read the menu. You eye the appetizers, scan salads and sandwiches, cruise the burgers and Early Bird Specials,...
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Published a month ago

Plug: Introducing Nachos Thursdays on freedomhaters.org
If you must look at other sites online, check out "Nacho Thursdays," a new weekly column about nachos on freedomhaters.org, from the writer of Luggage Tuesdays. Also, please check out SF Examiner's Public Transportation blog, from the editor of Luggage Tuesdays. RSS Feeds: Nacho Thursdays SF...
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Published a month ago

Losing contestants of the Radio Quiz will receive:
Year's supply of radio wax. Green tote bag that reads "Radio Quiz Loser." Home version of radio quiz (AA batteries and radio not included). 11" ruler, from Irregulars Liquidators. Dull-Point Brand No. 2 lead pencil. Abridged dictionary. Radio Quiz logo wristwatch. A trio* of portable electronic...
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Published 2 months ago

Family Restaurant Menu, Part 12: Alcoholic Beverages
Must look 21 or older. For more alcoholic beverages, see our Breakfast menu. Patrons must order meals when drinking at tables. Drinking without food available at the bar. Alcoholic beverages not available for take-out. GOVERNMENT WARNING: (1) According to the Surgeon General, women should not...
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Published 2 months ago

Sarcastic Sidekick Sayings (Listed Alphabetically)
Awesome. Awesome? Awesome! Come to daddy.Du-de. Epic fail. Fail.Failski.For reals? In that case, you're not going to like this, but... Is that, like, your final answer? Let me Google that for you.Needs more cowbell.Not your night? Not your night!Now you tell me.That'll do it. That looks...
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Published 2 months ago

You Know You Watch Too Much Television When...
...you name your first-born "Must Feed TV." ...you get bitten by dogs. ...you recognize your cell-mate from "Cops." ...your cell-mate recognizes you from "Street Patrol." ...you're unable to fast-forward through the Bowflex® TreadClimber® commercial because you're already strapped into a...
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Published 3 months ago

Letters to the Editors of Bizarre Names Monthly
Dear Editors of Bizarre Names Monthly I couldn't believe it when I opened my mailbox only to find Marilyn Manson on the cover of the new BNM ("His Name Combines Two Other Famous Names," November). He wasn't even born with that name. What a poser. Signed Ellie Fant Dear Editors of Bizarre Names...
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Published 3 months ago

Alka-Seltzer Jokes 2009 (Live, with photos)
Photos: Paul Hayes Helena "Noona" Nolan's Is What? Theater is a mobile theater for one. Performances occur inside a parked U-Haul, where one audience member at a time watches from a wooden booth next to the truck. On March 13, 2009, Luggage Tuesdays' Mike Spiegelman performed Alka-Seltzer Jokes...
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Published 3 months ago

What's That Noise?
Honking. Pissed-off bicyclist. Creepy children's voices. Fire crackers. Flat tire. Gunfire. Unicorn on a rainbow. Two dogs humping. Loud guy. Loud crazy guy. Loud drunk guy. Loud guy on cellphone. Cat burglar. Videogame music. Car alarms. Coffee sipping and slurping from that guy...
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Published 4 months ago

Spam Correspondence Addressed to United States Presidents
Cross-blogged at Library of Congress and Smithsonian Institution. To: Chester Arthur From: Bob Parade Subject: How To Become Very Wealthy Without Anyone Knowing To: John Adams From: UP all N1te Subject: Your instrument will stay on duty when you need that. To: Richard Nixon From: Square Trader...
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Published 4 months ago